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You may well be feeling sad and depressed that the divorce has gone through. Perhaps you’re thinking you’ve made a mistake so you want to win back your ex-wife and try again. If you feel that way, there’s a good chance if you put in the hard yards, that you’ll be able to win back your ex-wife for good. The marriage can be restored for good but the divorce doesn’t have to be forever.

Before you make any advances to restore the marriage you must do some sincere soul searching. Consider the motivation for restoring the marriage. Is it a selfish reason that is doom to fail before you begin? Consider what went wrong at the first attempt. Can you identify areas of responsibility in which you failed? Consider what it will take to put things right. Are you prepared to put in the hard yards to deal with your own issues?

The 15 biggest mistakes people make when trying to rescue their relationship and what to do instead

The 15 biggest mistakes people make when trying to rescue their relationship and what to do instead

If you can answer those questions and feel that you still want to win back your ex-wife, then here are a few pointers to help you:

1. You need to express how you feel and what you’re willing to do to make it work. She will appreciate your feelings, but don’t think that will be sufficient. She will want and need to know both how and why you believe that it would work out a second time around.

2. Eat some humble pie and admit the mistakes you have made. Regardless of whether your ex was the one who finally caused the break up, you’re not perfect and will have some areas that need to be acknowledged and worked on. Tell her what you think they are and what you’re willing to do about them. You could even invite her to contribute to your list of imperfections and be willing to work on them too. You should however keep your dignity and not start begging as that will be a turn off and make matters worse.

3. Listen to what your ex has to say. If you want to win back your ex-wife, you must listen to her and process what she says. Regardless of whether or not she’s interested in getting back together it will pay to listen. You will either learn what you need to do to move forward or you will learn what went wrong from her perspective. Be careful not to interrupt or be defensive, but listen with a sincere desire to put things right for her and not just yourself.

4. Be willing to give her some time and space. Do not overwhelm her with your emotions and desires. Express simply and clearly what we’ve outlined then back off and give her time to process things. The time to romance her again may come later if you don’t annoy her with insensitivity.

5. Start working on your own issues. This is crucial to win back your ex-wife. Any smart woman will want to see that you have changed before she’ll have you back if you were the cause of the break up. Even if you weren’t, the simple act of showing her you’re serious will have a positive affect on her. Simply choose to be a better, more positive person and work on whatever issues you need to become that person.

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6. If she’s willing to have another go, be prepared to take things slowly. If you’ve hurt her, she will need time to heal and trust you again. Do the things that you know she enjoys. Whether that’s something romantic or mundane help, meet her at her point of need. Restore the romance slowly and carefully without pushing her beyond where she wants to go. As you progress, pay close attention to what she says and respond accordingly.

If all this fails to win back your ex-wife, you will at least be a better and more mature person for the effort and have closure on the relationship.


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‘The 15 Biggest Critical Mistakes Made in a Relationship and What You Should Have Done Instead!’